A One Mann’s Movies review of “Aquaman And The Lost Kingdom” (2023).
I have to admit that I was not a fan of the original “Aquaman” in 2018. I didn’t see it on the big screen and after I saw it on streaming I note that I was so unimpressed that I couldn’t even be arsed to write a review for it…. something I very rarely do. So I went into “Aquaman 2” aka “Aquaman And The Lost Kingdom” with low expectations and those expectations were pretty well met.
Bob the Movie Man Rating:
Plot Summary:
Arthur Curry (Jason Momoa) is juggling the dual roles of being a Dad for his new son Junior and being the king of Atlantis. When Manta returns, bent on revenge for the death of his father and with new dark powers, the whole of Arthur’s bloodline is in danger, including the life of his son.
Certification:
UK: 12; US: PG-13. (From the BBFC web site: “Moderate violence, threat, injury detail, implied strong language”).
Talent:
Starring: Jason Momoa, Amber Heard, Nicole Kidman, Patrick Wilson, Yahya Abdul-Mateen II, Dolph Lundgren, Randall Park, Temuera Morrison, Martin Short, John Rhys-Davis.
Directed by: James Wan.
Written by: David Leslie Johnson-McGoldrick. (Based on a story by James Wan, David Leslie Johnson-McGoldrick, Jason Momoa & Thomas Pa’a Sibbett.)
Twitter Handle: #aquamanmovie.
Running Time: 2h 4m.
Gold vs Black in the final trident battle. Jason Momoa stars as Arthur Curry (which I always think sounds like what you might say when you look in the bag after getting back from the Purbani with a takeaway). (Source: Warner Bros).
“Aquaman And The Lost Kingdom” Review:
Positives:
- The battle at the finale of the film I found to be entertaining enough (although the ‘big boss’ seemed to be way too easily defeated given his supposed power).
- Watching Nicole Kidman in a tight-fitting silver suit riding a motorised shark is mildly diverting.
- The crew of Manta’s sub had me in stitches of laughter… as their outfits reminded me of black versions of the sperm in Woody Allen’s 1972 classic “Everything You Always Wanted to Know About Sex* (*But Were Afraid to Ask)”. (See picture below.)
- It was fun to spot the unmistakable tones of John “Asps, very dangerous, you go first” Rhys-Davis as the voice of the lobster (“Brine King”).
Woody Allen and some able semen in “Everything You Always Wanted to Know About Sex* (*But Were Afraid to Ask)” (Source: United Artists)
Note:
The ‘McGuffin’ here has the ridiculous name of Orichalcum. I thought that this was just the writers having friends called Rich and Al and thinking it would be fun to stick their names together and whack “Cum” on the end! (And I said as much on last night’s “Flickering Dreams” podcast.) But I stand corrected. It turns out that Orichalcum is a ‘real’ thing, and referenced in ancient texts in association to the fable of Atlantis. So, there you are. Here’s the wiki entry.
Negatives:
- The film’s meandering plot seems to make little sense when you analyse it. A large part of it involves travelling to a prison to release Arthur Curry’s brother Orm from prison. Why? Because one extra body would have made all the difference in a fight against the bad guy (who I don’t think they even knew had dark powers at the time)? And the attempt to shoehorn the threat of global warming into the plot just feels clumsy.
- The film seems to rip off scenes from a wide range of other films. The whole scene involving the mafia-boss Kingfish (voiced by Martin Short) is a complete but soggy steal from Jabba’s palace in “Return of the Jedi”; Manta’s final scene apes the cliffhanging ending of “Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade”; and the volcano island seems to be very similar to Pandora! Bizarrely, Marvel movies get referenced (Arther calls Orm “Loki” at one point) and taking a sharp left into the Harry Potter universe, Emma (on the the “Flickering Dreams” podcast) claims that Azkaban was mentioned!
- I like Jason Mamoa. I really do. I thought he added a lot of character and fun to the recent “Fast X” film as the unhinged bad-guy. But here, thanks to a painful script, his banter just comes across as desperate to raise a laugh. Unfortunately, at least in my pretty packed lunchtime screening, little laughter was to be heard. I had the odd smile and a guy in the next row laughed once. But that was about it.
Amber Heard as Mera. Allegedly not written out of the film (as the fan’s were demanding) because Elon Musk (her ex-boyfriend) threatened to “burn the house down” at Warner Brothers if she was cut. (Photo Source : Warner Bros)
Monkeys?
There is a mid-credit monkey featuring Patrick Wilson that is amusing enough. But there is NO monkey at the end of the credits.
Summary Thoughts on “Aquaman And The Lost Kingdom”
It’s a very bog-standard action film, over-ruled by CGI effects, under-used star-power, weak character development and a convoluted plot. It also cost $205 million to make. With that budget you could have made “Godzilla Minus One“, “Godzilla Zero”, “Godzilla One” … right through to “Godzilla 11” (and still had change). “Godzilla Minus One” is ten times the film that “Aquaman 2” is. Go see that instead! (As a curious coincidence, I note that this movie has an identical running time – 2 hours and 4 minutes – to the Godzilla movie!)
This is the last film in the DC Extended Universe before it comes under “new management” under the stewardship of James Gunn and Peter Safran. Would I be disappointed if I never saw another Aquaman film? Honestly, no.
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Trailer for “Aquaman And The Lost Kingdom”:
The trailer is here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FV3bqvOHRQo .
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