A One Mann’s Movies review of “Cocaine Bear” (2023).
Not since “Women Talking” (which I grant you was only two days ago) has a film’s title most accurately described the contents of a movie. It’s about a bear. And about cocaine. It’s about a bear that’s taken cocaine!
Bob the Movie Man Rating:
Plot Summary:
A drug trafficker offloads a massive cargo of cocaine out of a plane while flying over a national park area. A black bear becomes addicted to the substance, going on a murderous rampage as the under pressure drug baron (Ray Liotta, in his final role) and his gang try to retrieve the multi-million-dollar cache.
Certification:
UK: 15; US: R. (From the BBFC: “Strong gore, violence, drug references, language”). The “drug references” comment made me snort (with laughter, not the white stuff!). I’m a bit surprised, given the level of gore, (and indeed the two 12 year-olds sampling cocaine!) that this wasn’t an “18”. I guess it’s only the cartoonish nature of the whole piece that swayed the Board).
Talent:
Starring: Keri Russell, Alden Ehrenreich, O’Shea Jackson Jr., Ray Liotta, Isiah Whitlock Jr., Margo Martindale, Jesse Tyler Ferguson.
Directed by: Elizabeth Banks.
Written by: Jimmy Warden .
Twitter Handle: #cocainebear.
Hannah Hoekstra as Elsa, staying one foot ahead of the bear before the bear gets her foot ahead of her! (Source: Universal Pictures)
“Cocaine Bear” Review:
Positives:
- I thought this would be a gory but wasn’t quite prepared for the gore-fest that it turned out to be! Some of the set-piece scenes – particularly one with paramedics in a ranger station and one that follows in an ambulance – are hilariously executed. I laughed a lot (providing laughter at dismemberment and extreme pain are allowed, which in this case I think they are!). It would be easy to say that the gore would be very disturbing to many viewers, but it was done in such a cartoonish, ‘Tom and Jerry’-style way that the general response in the (well-attended) Saturday-night cinema was “Ha ha”, not “Ugh”.
- The bear CGI work (by Weta Digital) is superb. Our main protagonist looks and acts like a real bear (albeit one high on cocaine!)
- It’s a pretty good cast for such a “B-movie”, and all deliver their stuff with tongue very firmly in cheek. This was Ray Liotta’s last role: he passed away just a week after over-dubbing his dialogue in post-production.
Negatives:
- The film really flies when the bear is in action, but rather grounds to a halt for me with the clunky exposition that went on around that.
- I’ll give the film the benefit of the doubt that much of the dialogue, the acting and the God-awful elevator-style music by Mark Mothersbaugh is MEANT to be dreadful, to match the mood and style of “Sharknado”-style C-movies. In the same vein, aspects of the plot are utterly ludicrous. For example, Bob the cop (Isiah Whitlock Jr.) travels out to the Chattahoochee National Forest (3,506.47 km2, I looked it up) and just happens to find the drugs in the same gazebo that the bad guys are about to arrive at! It’s a film where what needs to happen happens and any application of probability or logic is futile.
True Story?
As the film suggests, the story is based on a true case where the drugs really were turfed out of a plane before the smuggler, Andrew Thornton, plummeted to his death in the suburb of Knoxville, Tennessee (as shown in the news footage in the film). The bear connection is that a black bear was found dead in the forest, and when dissected its stomach was “packed to the brim” with cocaine consumed from the stash. The rest is entirely fictitious!
Monkeys?
Yes, there are two monkeys, both mid-credits. The second of these is particularly funny! There’s no monkey per se at the end of the titles – just a final farewell audio from the bear!
Summary Thoughts on “Cocaine Bear”:
A good communal watch, I went with three other family members and we roared in laughter throughout. Like a good teen slasher, it’s fun to see a bunch of random, unlikeable individuals exit (pursued by a bear!) It’s not bloody Shakespeare, but it was good for a laugh.
I can’t wait for the two sequels in the works: Heroin Hamster and Ketamin Koala*.
(*Credit to Jack G. Wilson in the Mark Kermode Appreciation Society Facebook Group).
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Trailer for “Cocaine Bear”:
The trailer is here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DuWEEKeJLMI .
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