A One Mann’s Movies review of “The 355” (2022).
Bob the Movie Man Rating:
Hollywood seems to have struggled to find a truly winning formula for what I could describe as the ‘kick-ass girl genre’. There have been solo attempts with the (very good) “Atomic Blonde” and the (less good) “Red Sparrow“. And similarly, there’s been some good ‘Team Girlz’ efforts like “Widows” and poor efforts like “Oceans Eight“. “The 355” falls into the latter category and although it seems to be trying to kick start a franchise, it’s of middling quality.
Plot Summary:
A cybersecurity ‘McGuffin’ that can hack into any system and wreak havoc is at large with Colombian free-agent Luis Rojas (Edgar Ramírez). The device is the source of keen interest from terrorists and bad-uns from around the globe.
Four agents – the CIA’s Mac (Jessica Chastain); MI6’s Khadijah (Lupita Nyong’o); the German BND’s Schmidt (Diane Kruger) and the Chinese Lin Mi Sheng (Bingbing Fan) are pursuing the device around the globe. But closest to Rojas is a psychologist, Graciela Rivera (Penélope Cruz). But the forces lined up against the five women are formidable.
Certification:
Talent:
Starring: Jessica Chastain; Penélope Cruz, Lupita Nyong’o, Diane Kruger, Edgar Ramirez, Jason Flemyng, Sebastien Stan.
Directed by: Simon Kinberg.
Written by: Theresa Rebeck and Simon Kinberg.
“The 355” Review:
Positives:
- The movie has its moments in some of its action set pieces. There is a nice chase through Paris (although containing one of the most unbelievable train boarding events in movie history!). And a shoot-out in a Shanghai hotel is exciting if implausible.
- Of all the leads, Lupita Nyong’o is just electric to watch on screen. Here she gets a facial scar that just seems to add to rather than detract from her beauty. Penélope Cruz also looks astonishing, given she is in her mid-40’s.
Negatives:
- It’s all rather bland and paint-by-numbers. A set of action scenes strung together with a light plot. I’ll struggle to remember this one in a month’s time.
- The script asks you to suspend disbelief at various points. For example, the woman achieve that astonishing trick of being able to teleport around the world in the blink of an eye. During which time the plot conveniently hasn’t moved on one jot! Also, they spend a long time in Marrakesh without once being harrassed by anyone to go and visit the tannery. (That’s a joke for anyone who’s been to Marrakesh on holiday!).
- It’s a terrible name for a movie! The explanation – a single line from Chastain about “355” being the codename for the first female spy in the American Revolution – is pretty obscure!
Summary Thoughts on “The 355”
Look. It was a dreary rainy Tuesday night and the movie filled a need for a cosy night at the cinema. It wasn’t terrible. But it won’t win any awards either.
By the way, when is the movie featuring Sebastian Stan and Richard Madden as spy brothers coming out? I spent the whole of the movie thinking “Do you know, Richard Madden is MUCH better in this than he was in “Eternals“…. before the end titles revealed that it was Stan!
Trailer for “The 355”
The trailer is here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SV0s2S9reT0.
