A One Mann’s Movies review of “The Hitman’s Wife’s Bodyguard” (2021).
Bob the Movie Man Rating:
“The Hitman’s Bodyguard” rounded out the 2017 summer blockbuster season, and – in my view – was a lacklustre affair. Some sequels – “The Empire Strikes Back”, “The Dark Knight”, “Logan” – defy all expectation and exceed the original. But then again, here comes “The Hitman’s Wife’s Bodyguard”….
There’s quite a few scenes of them all captured like this. (Source: Lionsgate).
Plot Summary:
Struck-off bodyguard Michael Bryce (Ryan Reynolds) is plagued with nightmares about his failures, brought about by his nemesis Darius Kincaid (Samuel L Jackson) and his potty-mouthed wife Sonia (Salma Hayek). On doctor’s orders, he ‘retires’ from the business. But when Europe’s infrastructure is threatened by Greek megalomaniac Aristotle Papdopolous (Antonio Banderas) he is rudely dragged away from his briefly peaceful life and pitched back into utter mayhem.
Always good value, even with the Greco-Spanish accent! (Source: Lionsgate).
Certification:
Talent:
Starring: Ryan Reynolds, Samuel L Jackson, Salma Hayek, Antonio Banderas, Morgan Freeman.
Directed by: Patrick Hughes.
Written by: Tom O’Connor, Brandon Murphy and Phillip Murphy.
“Shocking. Positively shocking”. (Source: Lionsgate).
“The Hitman’s Wife’s Bodyguard” Review:
Positives:
- As a comedy thriller, it does pass the ‘6 laughs test’ in terms of the ‘comedy’ element. Some of these are minor chuckles. A few are really good belly laughs.
- Among these are some of the outrageous tirades of Salma Hayek: her accent makes some of the dialogue unintelligible, but given its X-rated nature, that’s not necessarily a bad thing! As a mid-50’s actress (Oh God – – don’t tell her I mentioned her age!), Ms Hayek indeed has an arrestingly attractive form.
- Seeing Antonio Banderas and Morgan Freeman on the screen is never anything other than a positive. (Although Banderas is like Sean Connery in failing to tailor his natural accent to any role he’s ever in!)
Selma Hayak. Mid 50’s? I’ll have some of what she’s having. (Source: Lionsgate).
Negatives:
- A general problem I have with ‘comedy thrillers’ is that the comedy nearly always negates any of the thrills. Ryan Reynolds is not playing Deadpool in this one, although he might as well be doing so based on the number of times he is hit by cars and other solid objects. The result is that although it has the trappings of a Bond or a Bourne – exotic locations (here, mostly Italian ones) ; exotic woman; car chases; heavily-armed henchmen; huge explosions – it delivers none of the tension or excitement. When matched with some rather dodgy post-shoot special effects, the effect is generally underwhelming.
- The plot here is shallow and ludicrous. A McGuffin involving a diamond drill tunnelling into “Europe’s data hub” to implant a virus is infantile.
- If there was an award for the clumsiest movie title of 2021, we may already have a winner.
The seatbelt. One of a number of great belly laughs. (Source: Lionsgate).
Summary Thoughts on “The Hitman’s Wife’s Bodyguard”:
Sequels are very occasionally better. Often they are much worse. This one, I have to say, delivers very much “more of the same”. Given that the writer/director team of Tom O’Connor and Patrick Hughes are in the driving seat, that’s not much of a surprise. The shtick is mildly diverting, occasionally downright funny, but quickly outstays its welcome. The 100 minute run time felt, for me, much longer.
Looking back at my 2017 review of the first film, I think I was being over-kind giving it 3 stars. I think this is neither better nor worse. So if you want to average the two and give each 2.75 stars out of 5, I wouldn’t object! But, again, it’s one I will struggle to remember much about in a few month’s time.
Trailer:
The trailer for “The Hitman’s Bodyguard’s Wife” is here – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9C0l31YcahQ .
